#OneWord365
In the Christian story of the Immaculate Conception, Mary is naturally celebrated for her obedience and courage. She’s a young, betrothed, virgin (unmarried woman) who is pregnant with the Son of God. In her society, this is considered an unpardonable sin and most familiar with the story, tradition and culture understand that her premarital pregnancy is punishable by death.
Even though I admire(d) Mary and gleaned the severity of her situation, every now and again, I would find myself full of questions about Joseph. Here’s a man who committed to marrying Mary at the appointed time. And here’s someone who, for what it’s worth, probably wasn’t a stranger in his community; he was a local carpenter. And after some time, word would get out that his woman was with child, but with who because they didn’t consummate the marriage. And, according to the Scriptures, Joseph had a few choices. He could have called her a lie, dragged her to the religious elders and leaders of the community, making a public example of her “moral indiscretions”. He could have called her family all sorts of foul and derogatory names, casting a shadow of shame that would be cleansed by what we know to be an honor killing. He could have, as we read in the Gospel account of Matthew (ch. 1:19) divorced her quietly in an effort to not put her to shame and publicly disgrace her. Instead, he stayed with her. He prayed on it, heard from On High, and stood by her side. Say what?!
During an end-of-year church service, one of the chaplains preached on this message. He highlighted the character attributes of Joseph, drawing connections between his core values and his career choice. This Chaplain first outlined Joseph’s professional reputation as a carpenter. Having grown up with a father who is a contractor, the chaplain understood some of the unique elements of construction work. In the world of carpentry or contract work as a whole, the customer focuses on three things: cost, quality (service and product) and time. On average, you can expect a great product by paying a fair price for more time or higher price for a shorter amount of time. But one of those things will be compromised. In other words, you’re not going to get a great wine barrel in two weeks for half the going rate. If you want a top notch barrel, you pay the top price and wait a little longer (or an astronomical price for quicker turn around), but it’s going to be outstanding (my Rota friends will understand the reference). So, in a small community, where everyone knows your grandmother, we can expect that Joseph upheld a solid business reputation with quality service.
But, how does that translate to his overall personal affairs and specifically, what is at the root of this?
Because this sermon was not my original idea, and I’m not going to take credit for it, the Chaplain went on to outline 4 key traits of Joseph, and highlighted them in the context of the story surrounding this decision to stay with Mary and accept Jesus as his son.
Joseph was: honorable (he didn’t shame Mary); he was considerate (the Bible says he considered all that was going on in light of the news and slept on it (v. 20); he was faithful (he knew the law and didn’t want to break it); and he was resolute or unwavering. That last bullet, that “resolute piece,” sank deep in my spirit. While all of these traits were especially golden, “resolute” was like a resounding gong. Here was a person who had a solid reputation as a top notch carpenter, knew the law, and had to make important decisions all day and every day about building materials and plans. And when you think about it, he also came up against a decision that, in his world view and paradigm, could cost him his reputation, honor, business and family name. You don’t want to threaten these things in his day or even now. Because no matter how you slice it, Joseph was with a (young) woman who told him her unborn son was consumed by The Holy Spirit, but what’s a woman’s word in that world (or even now in many cases)? And while “The Angel of the Lord” came to him in a dream and told him to “not be afraid but take Mary as his wife” (v.20-21), what’s Joseph’s word to that of the religious leaders and elders, and the keepers of the wedding night consummation cloth, heh?
But he was unwavering. He was resolute. He made a decision, stuck with it, come hell fire or village stone, and he was “ride or die.” I mean, dude was like sawdust in a workshop, not going anywhere (too cheesy?).
I give that backstory for two reasons.
So you can understand the inspiration for my word of the year.
So I can remember a great message that speaks volumes to my goal of the year.
I am terribly indecisive. I have gotten increasingly worse with time and it irks me. I understand that a lot of my indecisive nature is rooted in my analytical ways. I will analyze myself out of a situation and analysis paralysis will make me second guess my gut. Another reason behind this, and this is introspectively speaking because I haven’t talked with a professional or read a book about it, but I believe this indecisive trait comes from perfectionism and lack of contentment. I’m working on both. I believe that by focusing on being more resolute and decisive and unwavering in my decisions, I will let go of this need to get it right and perfect all the time. I will learn to be more content and trust The Almighty because I won’t wonder if I could have done it this way or that way. Naturally, I’m wondering if I should pick another word or focus on something that “should be” mastered first before expecting to be more resolute. Of course I’ll be considerate and not go into decisions blindly or without thought and prayer. But I’m done hemming and hawing and pacing and doing eenie meenie minie moe. Those days are gone. I don’t have time for all of that, and Lavender will definitely remind me that I don’t. My hope is that clarity and contentment will accompany this resolu-tion (wink).
So, without further delay, my word for 2020 is
“Resolute: admirably purposeful, determined and unwavering.”